wandering into and out of never quite knowing how the line ends before a thought or a new wave or expression falls the new explicitly reviving the old a sense forward of possibility of failure or success pleasing no one and replacing motion with stillness.

The feeling of being wrong, of seeing differences, of wanting to escape. People meet and the feeling is there, unknowable as to how it arose. There is the sense of I want what I can't have, and I don't want to want what I can't have. Double bind. Beautiful reason to let go of it all, accept the loss of future happiness. How easily the fear dissolves and forms again. It comes and goes in a clear light and is made out of nothing. There is no celebration or dullness. Red flowers, blue pools of water, green hills, pink flesh, white light and black space. A cross, a breast, a nipple, lips. Contracting, retreat, facing, loving, making love.